Bewildering Stories



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Cheese

Chunky Cheez

As the sun set slowly on the beautiful Munsh Mountains, a glass bottle descended from the sky and shattered as it collided with a large boulder. The note that had been contained by the bottle was swept by the wind onto the putty farm that was owned by Jacob, the farmer.

"Ah, my little putty plants!" exclaimed Jacob, glancing out the window at the field of magnificent putty plants. "It is time to harvest your Silly Putty!"

It was morning, and the putty plants had been producing lots of Silly Putty.

"Herbert! Claude!" he called, stretching and snapping a piece of Silly Putty. "Time for breakfast!"

The two pink flying pigs flew to Jacob.

Herbert, the fatter one, rushed to the table and sat down.

"Hey, Herbert! Look at this!" said Claude, the smaller pig.

Claude flew to the table and showed Herbert the note that he had found.

"'In the Munsh Mountains, a great treasure can be found! Lots and lots of cheese had been buried in a mound!'" read Herbert.

Smiles spread across their faces as they saw the treasure map on the back side of the note.

"We're searching for cheese!" announced the pigs.

"Huh? No! You can't do that!" argued Jacob. "Please don't leave me here alone on the putty farm! Please!"

Jacob frowned as he watched the pigs fly away toward the Munsh Mountains, a small mountain range.

"Look! The treasure's this way!" declared Herbert, pointing at Mt. Kewbvyd.

They flew about three miles to Mt. Kewbvyd, the third tallest mountain in the Munsh Mountains.

"The treasure map indicates that the treasure is at the peak of Mt. Kewbvyd!" gasped Herbert.

Suddenly, a big monkey hopped in front of them.

"It is I, the great Zarf of the Munsh Mountains!" the monkey shrieked. Thunder crashed.

"Hey, where did you get those sound effects?" snapped Herbert.

"You are very foolish pigs to have come here to search for...cheese? Cheese! Searching for cheese! That's the dumbest idea I've ever heard!" laughed Zarf.

"How did you know that we were searching for cheese?" questioned Claude.

"I possess telepathic abilities! I am capable of perceiving your continuous, electrical, encephalic reverberations!" replied Zarf.

"Huh?" asked the pigs, confused.

"I can read your tiny minds! Now go away! This mountain is a dangerous place for you pigs to be!" shouted Zarf.

As quick as he had appeared, Zarf vanished in a cloud of smoke.

"Did you hear what Zarf said?" whispered Claude. "We shouldn't continue searching for cheese!"

"Don't listen to that stupid monkey, claude! It's cheese that we want!" disagreed Herbert.

The pigs flew to the peak of the mountain, where they saw a large mound marked with a crimson X.

"We found the treasure!" acknowledged Herbert.

They dug up the heavy treasure chest.

A message had been written on the side of the chest.

"It says, 'Beware! Don't eat the cheese!'" remarked Claude.

Maybe I shouldn't eat the cheese, thought Claude. It could harm me!

"Sorry, Herbert. This is scaring me. I think the cheese is cursed!" admitted Claude.

"What are you saying? It can't be cursed!" claimed Herbert.

"I'm going! This is scaring me!" stated Claude.

"You're afraid of everything!" responded Herbert.

Claude flew back to Jacob's putty farm as Herbert opened the treasure.

"Cheese!" sighed Herbert.

He grabbed handfuls of cheese and devoured them.

"Beware the cheese! Beware the cheese!" groaned a rumbling voice. "Stay away from the cheese! Do not eat the cheese! Stay away!"

"Who's there?" cried Herbert.

"Turn around!" ordered the voice.

Herbert looked behind him and screamed.

"Bigfoot!" he squeaked.

"Yes! Bigfoot's the name!" agreed Bigfoot.

Herbert pleaded, "What do you want with me? Please let me go! I'm only a fat little pig with wings."

"Why did you ignore the warnings? Why?" demanded Bigfoot.

"Because I love cheese!" chuckled the pig.

"You are too greedy!" screamed Bigfoot.

Herbert showed no expression on his face.

"You are too fat! You eat too much! Eat less!" commanded Bigfoot. "You shall be punished!"

"No! Please don't punish me!" requested Herbert.

Claude saw lightning flash as he reached the putty farm that night.

"Jacob! Herbert's in trouble!" he told Jacob.

Jacob and Claude traveled to the peak of Mt. Kewbvyd. They searched for days, but Herbert was nowhere to be found. Only an amazing statue of cheese that remarkably resembled Herbert remained.

Copyright 2002 by Chunky Cheez.